In a bit of a haze I reach across to the nearby coffee table, taking up a pencil as I begin to scribble into the diary, dozing off with a smirk as I decide to make a little adjustment.
I quickly strike out the date of my first college entry, scribbling in today's date above it. The words on the page appear the quiver slightly in either anticipation or fear, though it may simply be a trick in my unfocused vision.
The date with the strike line through it however holds steady. It is as though it is pinned in place, speared to the page and stuck unlike the rest of the entry.
"There..." I mutter, smirking down at the journal in my hands. With the truly hellacious liquor coursing through my system leaving me feeling flushed and the worn dark blue blanket draped over me I feel myself growing warmer and warmer after my freezing night out.
The cozy sensation spurning on my actions, the comfort mingling with dense nostalgia as I cast my mind back to that night.
My first 'adult' party, though it was more a bunch of idiots dancing and drinking for the first time without proper parental supervision. Staying up to the wee hours of the morning, dancing despite not knowing how in the slightest, the new friends I made, and the new experiences for my innocent virginal self who had only had a single girlfriend before that point all worked to make the night seem legendary and monolithic in my mind.
It hangs in my thoughts as a wonderful night, a real high point of those formative years and really even in the whole timeline of my life thus far.
"Th... fucking there..." I huff, my head rolling and tilting from side to side. "Now tonight washn't...washn't a shit fucking night..." I chuckle, closing the diary with a loud clap. "It wash the besht night."
As the pages close a dull throb rocks the back of my skull, the sensation creeping deeper in as its claws sink into my brain. My vision begins to blur, the walls around me appearing to bleed and run like the ink in the waterlogged pages of the diary.
As the headache builds it shifts into a deep and drowsy sensation, my body collapsing against the hard armrest of the sofa as I let out a pained hiss. Despite the sudden shock of the impact and the pain rocking my shoulder I find my eyes fluttering closed, the need for sleep becoming suddenly too much to ignore.
As I come to I feel warm light streaming in from someplace unseen, the morning sun burning my skin and irritating my eyes. I groan in discomfort, my mind struggling to remember much of the night before in any real detail.
"How did I get to bed last night?" I think to myself, lifting an unseen hand in an effort to block out the light from my bedroom window. Despite the sheer amount of beer and shots I had downed the night before I feel surprisingly alright, a little headachey and parched but not the truly awful day-ruining experience I had been braced for.
My arm waves around in the general direction of where I think the window should be, the lazy motion stopping as I slam my hand against the hard wall and my arm against the back of a large and plush couch.
"Ouch" I hiss, a groggy yet extremely soft and feminine voice escaping my lips. It takes a moment for me to even notice the change in my intonation, my mind becoming distracted by a subtle and somewhat weighty shaking on my chest as I wave my arm about.
"Wh...what the..." I croak, the exceedingly quiet and meek sounding voice that escapes my lips causing me to clam up.
My eyes shoot open, the light in the room momentarily blinding me as they adjust to the sheer amount of natural light flooding the room. My head aches, but only ever so slightly, the sort of hangover that will vanish after a glass of water and a good meal.
The room at large is relatively blurry, a combination of sleep in my eyes and something deeper keeping me from making out the more distinct details. Opposite me sits a long wall of glass, showing the small carpeted pathway beyond the room and the balcony hanging over the area beneath me. Thankfully, there doesn't seem to be anyone else out there, the red cups scattered along the ground outside and early morning songbirds beyond the walls telling me most people wouldn't be up for a while.
The room itself is rather cozy and intimate. A set of three navy blue couches form a U-Shape, forming up to allow each of them to face the massive over 80-inch flat screen bolted to the wall. The TV itself is on, though muted, playing an episode of My Hero Academia from a small laptop next to it.
A few black bean bags sit in between the sofas, the long white coffee table having been dragged away and placed against the back wall by the door to make room for the additional seating. All the furniture looks relatively new and expensive, though if there was any wear and tear my straining eyes wouldn't have a chance to notice it.
Light streams in from behind me, the dark wood paneled wall having a row of glass panes at the tops. Even without the intense natural light the room itself is well lit, a series of warm comforting down lights dotting the same fake wood paneled ceiling is a segmented fashion as to be turned on and off by section.
"Where the hell..." I think to myself, lurching up as I try to get into a seated position. My train of thought tumbles away as I sit up and hunch over, a flurry of long sweaty brown hair quickly amassing around my face. Inhaling sharply, jumping slightly at the shock of the heavy mop of hair falling into my face, I'm met with the scent of lavender coming off the clinging lock and vodka with artificial strawberries from my breath.
Panicking I reach up to the wild and messy mass of follicles blocking my vision, yelping in surprise as I feel the thick and gross feeling strands outline my slender boney fingers. Pulling the curtain of hair away from my face I look at my hands, my heart skipping a beat as I'm met with the sight of a youthful pair of extremely delicate and slender feminine mitts.
My voice comes out in a sharp squeal as I lurch to my feet, my head whipping downwards as I feel the subtle jiggle on my chest once again. I'm dressed in a black v-neck shirt, an abstract image of Chocobos from Final Fantasy spread across the chest with unreadable kanji sitting beneath them. My collar bone is on full display, the open neckline revealing the delicate bones resting beneath the ghostly pale flesh. The hair atop my head hangs well past my shoulders, draping over my chest and down past my shoulder blades but an inch or so.
Resting on my chest are two rather modest mounds of fat, each one likely not even being a handful for my own tiny and dainty hands though feeling just about right for my slender frame. Due to their rather small size I appear to be lacking a bra, the perky orbs being free to bounce and tug at my chest beneath the short as my tiny sensitive nipples rub distractingly against the cotton covering them.
My arms are similar to my hands, delicate pale sticks without so much as an ounce of muscle and only a subtle amount of fat to give them a soft character. Light brown hairs shimmer in the morning sun, resting on my forearms along with the downy fuzz that appears to have replaced my forest of body hair.
My hips jut out a little more dramatically than my chest, the bony protrusions that make up my wide pelvis being hidden beneath a pair of tight black jeans. Slight stains dot the denim, a combination of food and drink that had been spilled on them since their last wash. They practically coat my lower body like a second skin, the material creaking slightly as I shift and flex my long and remarkably slender legs.
My eyes dart to a pair of cheap boots next to the sofa, the low-cost synthetic footwear appearing just the right size for my small and feminine feet. A pair of rather large glasses rest in one of the shoes, the frames being entirely see-through but for a few strands of wispy orange color. In the other sits a small familiar black book, my pencil slid in between the pages.
"What...the...fuck..." I squeak, shivering in place and wincing with each and every word.
Leaning down I snatch up the glasses and the book, quickly placing the strangely heavy frames on the bridge of my nose. It's like an act of magic as the world snaps into focus, the distant and indistinct objects quickly becoming crisp and clear.
My hazel eyes go wide as I stare at my reflection in the glass, my thin lips parting as I stare at myself dumbfounded. Looking back at me is a young woman, barely past the age of eighteen and standing at around 5'10", a look of utter shock and confusion spread across her cute freckled face. She looks extremely familiar, but in a composite sort of way. If anything I would have pegged her as my nonexistent step-sister, the child of my mother and David made flesh.
I still had my own relatively thin lips, my slightly too large ears, and my light brown hair. However, the strong jawline I had inherited from my father is gone, as is my strong and prominent nose. Instead I find my mother's weak and delicate chin resting beneath my mouth, her slender jawline leaving me with a cute and innocent face. My nose is quite a bit more petite, the slender and slight feature in the center of my face reminding me of David's older sister.
My eyes are a strange blend of color. Refusing to show either my mother's steely blue or David's deep green they instead reflect a mixture of the two, a muddy yellow-green staring back at me as I twist my head from side to side to get a better look at the woman in the reflection. My thin and subtle eyebrows are gone, replaced with David's thick dark caterpillars that only act to give more of a unique character to my sweet innocent face.
With my jaw still agape I drop to the sofa again, wincing as I feel my chest bounce with the sudden impact. I feel the cushion of the couch press against me with a little more detail than before, my relatively large and pert behind acting like a second pillow that lifts me up slightly. My mother had always been a bottom-heavy woman, lacking much in the way of the chest department but making up for it with her hips and behind, and it seems like this new apparent daughter of hers had some similarly distributed assets.
My body itself is rake thin, without so much as an ounce of flab on my flat stomach as my ribs show through my skin ever so slightly. However, my ass feels far more full as it squishes and deforms beneath the weight of my body despite feeling firm and full.
I'm about to scream in shock, the young woman in the reflection mirroring the terrified build-up. However, I stop myself moments beforehand as I bite my tongue, my eyes catching the sight of a sleeping person rolling over in one of the bean bags.
I freeze up, looking down at the short wiry-haired brunette in a Dungeons and Dragons shirt. It's a baggy outfit, acting more like a dress or blanket than a t-shirt. She shifts about in her sleep, snoring ever so slightly due to the probably rather poor rest she was receiving. Her short legs are covered up by a pair of equally as baggy black jeans, our nerdy outfits coordinating a little too well though mine appeared to show off my body a little more than her own.
Taking a deep breath I try to calm down, my dry mouth and slightly throbbing head making it a little hard to focus.
"Okay..." I whisper to myself, listening to my soft and sweet bookish voice escape my lips. "Okay, this...this is a dream...a weird fucking dream" I mutter, running my tongue along my teeth as I find them strangely without fault. I had always had problems with overcrowding since I was a teenager, but we could never afford to get it fixed. It is uncanny as I run my new tongue over the neat and organized rows of teeth in my mouth, not feeling a single one out of place.
"Teeth stuff...that's a dream thing..." I mumble, fiddling with the little black book in my hands. "But it's usually about them falling out...oh god please don't make them fall out" I whimper, my eyes drifting down to the black book.
Some of the memories from last night creep back into my head, the drunken and jumbled memories being difficult to make out any of the specifics. The heavy drinking, the rain, the car and the fucking asshole laughing at me, it all slowly comes back drenched in a thick haze that makes it hard to pinpoint any exact thing that happened as opposed to more of the general feelings and vibes.
Noticing the pencil repurposed as a bookmark I whip open the diary, remembering something about it relating to last night. As I stare at the pages I cock an eyebrow, the diary itself seeming...different.
"This was...yeah it was drenched last night" I whisper under my breath, my eyes glued to the perfectly clean and crisp white pages. It was as though last night hadn't happened, no being dropped in the rain or soaking in the muddy gutter.
I slowly remember the entries from last night, namely that of the man supposedly named 'Louis' and my sad personal entry that I knew I had never written. my eyes dart to the top of the page, quickly confirming yesterday's date with a sigh.
"Twenty-fifth...okay so this is.." I begin to muse, my words failing to form properly as I read the rest of the entry
25/02/2022
06/02/2012
Dear Diary,
Today has been wild.
I just finished unpacking my boxes at my new dorm, finally have all my consoles out and hooked up to my TV. It was so nice to have mom and dad help, I don't think I could have carried it all on my own. My room is perfect! I know it's cheap but it's just so nice and cozy I LOVE IT.
Maybe I'll invite some of my new friends over to play some games after the movie night tonight as like a housewarming.
That's right you heard me, I've made new friends! And on the first day too! It was kinda funny, Sarah was wearing a D&D shirt and she saw me in my FF one so we both went to introduce ourselves at the same time.
Just finished up with the dance and wow, so much to tell. I met a cute guy, apparently he's Sarah's neighbor and is super cute. We danced for a bit before heading to the movie night with everyone else. Paul and I, his name's Paul by the way, we made out for like an hour. It was so hot, hell, I even made out with this chick Chelsea once she got bored with watching "weeb shit".
Fuck you James, you fucked up you loser. Who's clingy and awkward now? :p
Sarah and I even kissed a little, the 'twins' making out was apparently quite the scene, and I kind of liked it. I mean I think, fuck I had too much. College is soooooo fucking much fun.
This was the best night of my life.
Can't wait to update you,
Jordyn
My blood runs cold as I read the entry, the resemblance to my first ever one from college not being lost on me. Gone is the entry of the night before, the mentions of not being able to find a job or of the encounter with the man and his date having vanished from the pages entirely.
"This...this can't be right..." I whimper, adjusting my glasses absentmindedly as I inspect the pages. "No...no I started college in...fuck, early February twenty twelve" I muse, the words on the page fading away and reforming before my eyes as I focus on the rough date.
06/02/2012
deary dairy
school was boring
we learned timestables and they were hard
at lunch i wanted to play pokemons but damian said it was for boys
i cried and played my ds any way
tolddaddy when he came afer school and he bought icecream
he got me a turtwig and i love him
jordyn
My stomach sinks as I read the entry, the terrible chicken scratch and poorly formed sentences making it seem like I child had written it rather than the eighteen-year-old man that should have. What had happened to...me? Where had I gone? Did I still exist somewhere out there? What about all the things I had done, though it wasn't like I had made much of an impact in the grand scheme of things.
Before I can think much more on the topic, my mental state spiraling as I stare down that the terrifying book in my slender hands, I hear a loud beep and the clunking of the lock disengaging from the nearby door.
Wide-eyed with shock I whip my head around, showering my face with thick voluminous hair. Huffing a little and pursing my lips I manage to blow a large some of it away, allowing me to see as two young adults walk into the room.
The young man is around 5'10" and dressed in a crumpled and crinkled black-gray button-up shirt, the buttons at the top having been undone to reveal a faint amount of chest hair poking through the top. Sandy blonde hair hangs around his ears, a messy mop of unkempt strands that appear to have not been touched up by a hairdresser in quite some time. Heavy dark bags rest beneath his eyes, marring his otherwise pale pink complexion, the lack of sleep apparent in his dreary expression and slumped posture. A dark navy blue waistcoat hangs from his broad shoulders, also unbuttoned after the night prior. Loose and baggy jeans cover his lower body, the outfit appearing to reflect a person who was trying to look like a fancy adult but simply lacked the fashion sense or wardrobe to do so.
The young woman next to him looks equally as tired though a little better groomed. She stands around 5'6", her average to somewhat soft and pudgy build being largely hidden beneath a tent-like white shirt that hangs from her shoulder. A short black pixie cut stands up in a floofed manner, having been freshly washed and dried since she woke up. Her warm Mediterranean skin glows in the morning sun, whatever grime from last night having been washed away. As she walks into the room her eyes fall onto me, a faint twitch of a smile quickly forming before she tries to hide it.
"We brought..." says the young woman excitedly, her voice bounding with the same warmth as her complexion, pausing as she is elbowed by the young man who points at the sleeping girl on the bean bags. The young woman of Italian descent cringes as she watches the tiny brunette roll around a little, obviously having disturbed her sleep.
"Sorry...sorry..." she whispers, holding up the bags in her hands. "We...got...food..." she mouthes, her teeth still clenched as the young man just shakes his head with a grin.
"And caffeine" the man whispers, holding up a large can of energy drink. My eyes linger on the large thick can, my dry mouth salivating at the sight of the cloyingly sugary drink.
"Food?" whimpers a quiet and sleepy voice, all three of us turning to look at the tiny brunette as she writhes and stretches in the beanbag. "There's food? Where?" she groans, wiping the sleep from her eyes with one hand as she pats around herself in search of something.
The young woman paces over to us, still mouthing sorry as she approaches the couches. "Yeah, we got you some food sweetie" she coos softly, trying to sound as soothing as possible as she sashays over towards me with the bulging bags of fast food.
The scent of cheap meat and fried food soon reach my nostrils, my stomach growling as I realize just how hungry I am for the first time.
"I want... food" coos the tiny brunette swimming in her own clothes, her hand finding the thick pair of glasses on the floor and bringing them to her face. "Where...where do I need to go to..."
"We brought you some too Sarah" the young man calls out, grabbing the coffee table and lifting it like it was nothing at all. As he swings it about in front of him, walking over towards us so we can have something to eat on, it finally clicks that the expensive-looking table is likely made of cardboard and cheap pulped wood.
"Thaaaanks Paul..." the sleepy brunette calls back, wriggling up the bean bag like some sort of adorable slug as she slumps over the top of it.
The young Mediterranean woman plops down beside me, a little closer than I would have expected someone to do when I was a man. I can feel her body heat against me as she leans over, placing one of the bags in my lap.
"Awwwwww is that a diary?" she coos, nodding to the book in my lap. "Writing about last night?" she continues, giving a little wink at me and raising her eyebrows at Sarah. The sleepy brunette's cheeks suddenly burn a deep deep red, the events of last night quickly washing back over her.
"I...I mean...you guys dared us...and...and..." she splutters, unable to look at any of us in the eyes as Paul kicks some of the bean bags aside and places the table down.
"Calm down, it's alright" Paul coos, trying to calm down his little neighbor. "Chelsea's just being a bitch" he chuckles, dropping into the couch to the left of mine and Chelsea's. He places the can of energy drink on the table, sliding it over towards me as he pulls one of his own out.
"Fuck you" groans, Chelsea, rolling her eyes as she places a bag on the table and tears it open to reveal a truly immense amount of fries and dirt cheap cheeseburgers.
"Is that an offer?" Paul snaps back, giving her a bit of a kissy face. He quickly begins to grab at the fries spilling out onto the table, shoveling the greasy food into his mouth and groaning in satisfaction.
Before Chelsea can respond Sarah snatches up a burger, cramming it into her mouth as she begins to speak. "Wheresh everyone elshe?" she asks, looking around in search of some other people that just weren't in the room.
"Getting ready" Chelsea explains in a matter-of-fact tone, reaching into the bag in my lap and leaning against me as she routes around for her preferred food.
"Um...ready for...what?..." I ask, my voice barely coming out in a nervous squeak as I talk to these complete strangers.
"Was it that big of a night?" Paul asks, nodding down to the energy drink again as I quickly snatch it up. "We...
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